As most frontend developers are aware, one of the most frustrating aspects of our job is that we are often evaluated based on the quality of designs that we are building. Whether we like it or not, it is the first thing people see when we send them portfolio items / projects we've worked on. So while this is not as crippling to those with design skills, those of us that fall on the more technical side often have to resort to templates and design systems in order to work on projects without a designer.

While this is good enough for some, I have personally wrestled with a feeling of frustration and inadequacy when it comes to new projects I want to work on. And though I am not proud to admit it, the inability to create a good looking design has stopped me full on in my tracks to releasing things to the public. I am aware that my standards are much higher than I need them to be, but this nagging sensation is something I can't seem to get rid of.

For those who don't know, when I first started getting into the tech industry professionally, my goal was to actually be a UX/UI designer. And while I am able to hold my own in a discussion about user experience, I was never able to break the barrier of creating my own designs from nothing. Don't get me wrong though. Most of the reason was due to a fear of failure and just general insecurity of not being good enough, which led to not spending the time needed to synchronize my design sense with actual design skill.

The reason I'm writing about this now is because I am tired of being a complete invalid when it comes to creating design. Is this post some sort of foreshadowing to me becoming a full blown UI Designer? I doubt it. I love working with code and know myself well enough to know that the developer realm is where I thrive the most.

However, there is clearly something calling me from the design realm and I refuse to leave that stone unturned any longer. And regardless of the outcome, you can find the chronicles of my journey here. See you on the other side.